Career Enrichment Primer -- Part 2

Connecting (Build Your Network)

Now that you have defined “who” you are, determined what makes you unique, and packaged that into a brand statement – that is, you have characterized yourself – it is time to connect with others. To better enable you to connect with others, let me address five questions about networking.

1. What is networking? [1:8-15]
It is the process of sharing your knowledge and resources, time and energy, friends and associates, and empathy and compassion in a continual effort to provide value to others, while coincidentally increasing the value of your network. It is not an impersonal effort. It is really about connecting with others. Real networking is about finding ways to make other people more successful. It is about working hard to give more than you get. It is a constant process of giving and receiving – of asking for and offering help.

2. Why should one network?
One should network, first, because you can’t get there alone. No matter how smart you are, how much innate talent you’re born with, where you come from, and how much you started out with – you will be unable to achieve your goals in life alone. Success in any field, but especially in business, is about working with people. The individual who know the right people, for the right reasons, and utilizes the power of these relationships can become a member of the “club”, whether or he started out as a caddie or not! [1:15]

Second, we live in an age where relationships are more important than seniority. Where employees once found generosity and loyalty in the companies we worked for, today we must find them in a network of our own relationships. [1:17] You can amass a large network of relationships by feverishly connecting others. The more people you help, the more help you’ll have and the more help you’ll have helping others! [1:16]

Third, networks are like muscles – the more you work them, the stronger they become. [1:19] Too often, we get caught up in focusing solely on the work that will get us through the day. We are too busy meeting deadlines, racing off to soccer practice, and watching our favorite TV show to invest in connecting. Taking this course of action causes our network to become limp and weak. We become less effective in helping others while assuring that our network will be of less value when it is needed for our own career advancement. The idea isn’t to find oneself another environment tomorrow – be it a new job or a new career – but to be constantly creating the community that enables you to find a new job (or a new career), no matter what may occur.

3. What does one share when networking?
Tim Sanders nails this answer in his wonderful book, “Love is the Killer App.” We are to share our knowledge, our network, and our compassion. Let me provide you with some details around his answer.

o Knowledge
By knowledge, I mean everything you have learned and everything you continue to learn [2:13]. We live in an age where information is more important than experience. In fact, information (or knowledge) is value currency [2:67]. Someone talking about the latest reality television show may attract a brief audience at the coffee machine, but someone who tells people about Nicholas Carr’s “The Big Switch” and who finds a way for them to connect the ideas to their careers so that they own the book (so that they can use it themselves to succeed in their jobs), is a person of genuine value. It’s the difference between knowing which sports team is in first place and which new business idea can propel a career forward. [2:68]

Power, today, comes from sharing information, not withholding it [1:146].That is why you transmit knowledge. You’re not just handing out some weight-loss hint or a workout tip or a recipe for a great tasting low-fat cake. You’re giving someone knowledge that can advance a career. You want to become a “theory-slinging, expert-quoting, knowledge-throwing” [2:68] person that makes you stand out from the pack and keeps them coming back!

Where do you obtain this knowledge? First, you focus on books. They are complete “meals.” They contain hypotheses, data, research, and conclusions. Second, you need to be reading magazines. While they aren’t necessarily intended to transfer entire thoughts, they can contain a kernel of an idea that prompt you to do further study. Third, you need to be perusing blogs for the same reason you read magazine articles – to grasp an idea that is worthy of further study. Finally, you need to be attending seminars. These seminars enable you to hear thought leadership while interacting with peers. Bottom line: Share your knowledge!

o Network
By network, I mean your entire web of relationships [2:14]. Each person in your network is relevant. Sometimes people who may appear powerless or insignificant are potential networking superstars. These connections within your network can accomplish almost anything. They can open doors for job seekers (including you). They can make it possible for you to be introduced to a contact (a person or a company) that you did not have a direct relationship with. They can enable you to spin your “web” out farther and farther. The bigger your network gets, the more attractive it becomes, and the faster it grows. Real power comes from being indispensable. Indispensability comes from being seen as “super-connector” – a person who is able to parcel out as much information, contacts, and good will to as many people as possible [1:174]. Become a super-connector. Share your network!

o Compassion
By compassion, I mean that personal quality that machines can never possess – the human ability to reach out with warmth, whether through eye contact, physical touch, or words [2:17]. Showing your compassionate and caring nature will aid you in forging a successful network [3:37]. By expressing your compassion, you create an experience that distinguishes you. When you create an experience that distinguishes you, people remember you. When people remember you, your network grows quickly and exponentially.

How do you show compassion? You make it clear right away that the focus of the conversation is for the benefit and happiness of the other person. You don’t remind them of what they can do for you. Rather, you focus on what you might be able to do for them. You seek to listen rather than to be heard. You seek to understand rather than to be understood. You seek to learn what problems they are facing (i.e., what is your “pain”?) and you emphasize with their pain. You seek to understand what they have committed to do for their boss. You seek to understand how you can make them a hero. You ask: “How can I help you?” rather than “How can you help me?” You ask simple questions like: “How are you?” The surest way to become special in the eyes of other people is to show them compassion.

I believe that sharing compassion is one of the most underappreciated assets in business today [1:145]. Every conversation you have is an opportunity to risk being seen as weak or vulnerable. You risk revealing the real you. What’s the worst thing that can happen? They don’t respond in kind. So what, they probably weren’t worth knowing in the first place! Sharing compassion enables you to engender deep emotional bonds that both enrich and extend your network – for you and for those in your network. Sharing compassion creates a higher level of commitment from those in your network and it even provides you with a larger margin of error during those times when you are less than perfect [2:160]. Be a love-cat (Tim Sanders’ term), share your compassion!

4. Who do you network with?
You network with everybody. You include every fellow employee, every vendor partner, every friend, every person you meet at a seminar, every person who will connect with you via LinkedIn, and every peer that you serve with on a panel or governing body. Adding individuals to your network works best when it’s done with the under-lying philosophy that every person is potentially relevant to you and your network [2:119]. Each person in your network should be seen as a partner [1:139].

All of this takes work. It involves a lot of sweat equity. It means setting aside 3-5 time slots a week to “network” (e.g., coffee, office appointment, breakfast, lunch, dinner). It means you have to think hard not only about yourself but about other people. Once you are committed to reaching out to others in an attempt to expand the number of your connections, you’ll benefit from an ever-growing, vibrant network of people that you care for and who care for you [1:13].

5. What are the benefits of networking? [2:42-50]
The benefits from actively building and exercising a network are numerous. First, you build your brand. There are few ways to better market your brand than to be known for having a dynamic network or seen as a super-connector. Second, you create an experience. When you are seen as being knowledgeable, generous, and compassionate – you are not just a name, a service provider, or a product. You are fun, you are interesting, you are valuable. Third, you gain access to people’s attention. Others get only time. Fourth, you gain their trust and respect. People will presume that your arguments are correct, your recommendations are solid, and your referrals are valuable. Fifth, you receive exceptional feedback. People keep talking to you. You learn what crashes, what craters, what flies, and what soars. Finally, you gain personal satisfaction. You benefit from serving others.